Thursday, November 20, 2008

A Good Wife?

    Okay, I was stumbling earlier and found this site here. It's called Robin's Web and I really didn't look at the site so I don't know what it's about. But the post actually is just a repost of an article from Houskeeping Monthly (a magazine from the 50's). In this post, it simply lists ways to be a better wife. Of course all of them are reflective of the 1950's culture.

    Now, a lot of them are just disrespectful to women (and men if they have any sense). But some of them, although they seem crazy and stupid to today's culture and society, aren't too far from the truth. After all, consider the state of the family and society in the 50's with some of these "guidelines for wives" in comparison with what we have today from wives and the state of our society.

    In the fifties abortion, divorce, and crime (along with a few other statistics/issues) were a lot lower than today. Now does that fall on the shoulders of the wife? No. In fact, crime to a degree falls on the shoulders of the father not being present in the home. Studies have proven this.

    But the wife does play a part, both as wife and mother. Let's take this one for example: Your goal: To try and make sure your home is a place of peace, order, and tranquillity where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit. To the wife that does not work, the one who stays at home and raises the children and "keeps the home." This statement is dead on, as research has shown. To feminist, this statement, theirs and mine, are a slap in the face and blasphemy. To those who seek the truth and those in the counseling and psychiatric profession, they're as true as can be.

    Studies have shown that the men see their home as a place of rest and peace, and when there is no peace and it is unrestful, they tend to want to stay away: to go out, to stay at work, even find other women. And that's one way marriages fall apart.

    Let's look at another one. Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have be thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal  (especially his favourite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed. Again, this one is dead on. If that's what your husband likes, if he works until dinner time, greeting him with dinner on the table (or close) is one way of saying "thank you for working hard for your family." Things like this really are welcoming to a husband.

    Now there are some things that are just way out there that everyone should agree on. Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours. This one is right one and right off. Listen to him? Oh yes. And the moment of his arrival is not the best time to tell him all the problems of the day. No man or woman wants to come home and the first thing that they hear is the problems they're facing. More so, they'd like to hear a nice welcome. One time in school, it might have been a communication or leadership class, I heard a teacher say that a good way to get someone to talk to you about what you want to talk about is to talk to them about what they want to talk about. That works not just for couples, but everyone. For one, it's like a 'you owe me' for sitting through listening to you.

    Of course the last part is not on the mark. His topics of conversation are more important than yours? Whatever. The only place that this might ring true is if his topics are of more importance to the couple or are higher priority than the other. There are others. You can go check them out at the link above.

    Next time I'll let you in on a little secret for woman that apparently is all the rage halfway across the world. Although I think it's quite stupid. Be blessed.

    

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